Updated: Mar 23
Today my phone's calendar alerted me, like it always does, that it was time for me to teach class. Except this time, I got the notification sitting on my couch at home. Not in the studio where I usually am, already getting warmed up, preparing choreography, activities, and music playlists.
Because of school, business, and general daily life being shut down and placed completely on hold at the wise advice of health professionals and government officials, I find myself at home when I would otherwise be teaching -- indefinitely.
There is a lot going on in my head right now. Major thoughts like financial worries, "If I'm not working, how will I pay my bills?" Health concerns, "Will my family and I be ok faced with the dangers of this illness?" and so much more is bouncing through my mind, not to mention the more frivolous concerns of "Will I even be able to handle being socially isolated and cooped up for an unspecified amount of time?"
I am giving myself the time to grieve. Grieve for the missed opportunities, the lost classroom connections, the progress I know we as a class will have to work hard to make up. I grieve for my students missing chances to perform the pieces they've worked so hard to perfect.
But I also know that I need to keep going, keep caring for myself and others, and set a good example online, in the capacities I can, as a teacher and role model for young children.
So I am trying to frame my language differently. Instead of saying, "What will I do if I have to stay home?!" I am trying to express positivity and find a silver lining. "What opportunities will I have that I would otherwise have missed if I get to stay home?"
I am thankful that I have a safe, warm home to stay in. I have a loving family, lots of healthy food to keep me strong during this time, and plenty of hobbies, projects, and activities I always say I wish I had more time to do.
So I am quilting, cleaning, blogging, working on digital media, and doing all the things I always wish I had more time for.
And I am wishing you health, safety, and serenity during this fearful and stressful time.
Lots of love